had a really rough day at lab today. some of the prof cfm their students already, XP and JY got their project today. At first i tt it was nothing, prob mine will come soon but it din. dunno y i feel so upset too.. stressed and worried. i dislike the uncertainess feeling. Am i really tt not good or just really horrible? feeling like crying.. cos i really not confident of gettin my 2nd choice. is nanoparticle the project i will be doing for the next year? will i be able to survive? was taking honours the correct choice?

there r just so many things tt i want to say but it is just too messy. too many feelings, dunno whether to be angry, sad, worried, just vexed.. vexed.. n more of tt!!!life suddenly seems so lost. it is very frustrating.. i really dunno what else to say.

maybe i shld stop and leave things to fate.. if i am destined to do certain things i will be... :(